"Oh wow, another plebeian asking about something that clearly doesn't involve them. But fine, I know you're going to get as annoying as flies when I keep on saying no. My "mother" treated my father like how a rich b*tch treats her boyfriend when she finds someone more, ah, interesting for her. In short, she found a more "perfect" man and left father and had another kid. Turns out he wasn't that bad but eh, Elissa does have a kind of positive opinion on him."
"Pretty soon, Elissa, our other half-bro, and I were attending Durmstrang, which was about the same time visits stopped happening. Shame. Elissa did her thing and I did mine. I was, and still am, confident and cocky as heck. Wonder why I'm still alive after all this time? Because of my devastatingly hot looks and amazing skills, obviously."
"Time flies by, sh*t happens, and all other hoo-ha you don't have the privilege of knowing about, we graduated. Most people excel in mundane subjects, we excel in spying and thievery, much more exciting than your usual *cough* Light subjects. Our father soon introduced a new course, killing. And whaddya know, another timeskip, another disappearance. Yay. This time, our half-brother pulled the disappearance act. We heard rumors about his whereabouts, each one more batship crazier than the last. Whatever the case, hopefully he doesn't return with a freaking kid. We've got enough surprise babies around here."
"Eventually, Elissa and I got, ah, confronted by someone while we were hanging around an alley. Our little guest turned out to be just someone offering us a fascinating job. Turns out the guy had a girl, too, and we started working for them. One day, they decided that it's a good idea to move to England and ta-da."