This character has been requested to be preserved by CattyTheOrchid16.

king of arseholes

Confident, cocky, and sassy, Conrad Ulrich Brandt is the epitome of annoying. But really, he doesn't give a sh*t about anything unless his twin wants him to.

Full Name Conrad Ulrich Brandt
Born 15 May
Age 21
Status Alive | Single
Gender Male (cis)
Species Human | Wizard
Nationality German
Ethnicity German
Blood Status Half-Blood
Orientations Asexual graydemiromantic
Father Josef Brandt
Mother Margie Cook (nee Cox)
Siblings Elissa Brandt (twin)
Nolan Cook (half-brother)
Alexandrine Himmelreich (half-sister)
Jakob Brandt (half-brother)
Spouse N/A
Children N/A
Other Relatives N/A
Ancestral Home Germany
Most Important People Elissa & Alexandrine


School Durmstrang
Electives N/A
Average Grade EE
Year Graduated
Drumstrang Crest.png
Wand Black walnut | Phoenix feather | 10"
Animagus/Patronus N/A | Tiger
Boggart WIP
Amortentia WIP
Mirror of Erised WIP
Exotic? No
Occupation Professional assassin, thief, and spy for hire
Loyalty Elissa
Organizations Depends


Physical Information
Model Jaime Campbell Bower
Hair Colour Blonde
Eye Colour Blue
Handedness Depends
Voice Type Baritone
Eyesight 20/20
Health Status Healthy
Most Notable Accessories Silver chain necklace
Distinguishing Marks Scars all over

If there's a world of assholes, then Conrad would be the King Asshole. He's obnoxiously confident and annoying, it's a surprise he's still alive with all the people he pissed off. The worst part? He's got the abilities to back him up. You won't believe how much he enjoys rubbing this on other people's faces. The only upside is that he is not one of those flirtatious bastards since he is ace, but that doesn't stop him from flirting with some aesthetically pleasant ladies for a mission.

That's how he is for people who don't know him very well. But among his sister and close friends including Alexandrine, I'm afraid, he's a bit more controlled and very protective. Trust me, he will kick your arse once you touch a hair on their heads. But he does show his protectiveness in a more subtle way.

He doesn't see world in black and white, he doesn't see it in gray either. He doesn't care about the 'Greater Good' or the 'let's rule the world' and anything in between bullshit, to him, they're just boring crap that people use to get the illusion of them meaning something. Those missions he goes to? They're just for relieving boredom.

To him, the world is boring and predictable. Those 'omg im different from other ppl im a speshul snowflake' people are cliché, those 'i blend in the background im like normal people' are cliché. Hell, even he thinks he's cliché. Whenever there's something new, everyone else tries to duplicate it. People just want to stick out and be on the highest pedestal. And yes, even other people who don't want to stick out still stick out, one way or another, no matter what they do. So he doesn't really bother, unless his sister wants him to.


"Oh wow, another plebeian asking about something that clearly doesn't involve them. But fine, I know you're going to get as annoying as flies when I keep on saying no. My "mother" treated my father like how a rich b*tch treats her boyfriend when she finds someone more, ah, interesting for her. In short, she found a more "perfect" man and left father and had another kid. Turns out he wasn't that bad but eh, Elissa does have a kind of positive opinion on him."

"Pretty soon, Elissa, our other half-bro, and I were attending Durmstrang, which was about the same time visits stopped happening. Shame. Elissa did her thing and I did mine. I was, and still am, confident and cocky as heck. Wonder why I'm still alive after all this time? Because of my devastatingly hot looks and amazing skills, obviously."

"Time flies by, sh*t happens, and all other hoo-ha you don't have the privilege of knowing about, we graduated. Most people excel in mundane subjects, we excel in spying and thievery, much more exciting than your usual *cough* Light subjects. Our father soon introduced a new course, killing. And whaddya know, another timeskip, another disappearance. Yay. This time, our half-brother pulled the disappearance act. We heard rumors about his whereabouts, each one more batship crazier than the last. Whatever the case, hopefully he doesn't return with a freaking kid. We've got enough surprise babies around here."

"Eventually, Elissa and I got, ah, confronted by someone while we were hanging around an alley. Our little guest turned out to be just someone offering us a fascinating job. Turns out the guy had a girl, too, and we started working for them. One day, they decided that it's a good idea to move to England and ta-da."


  • Conrad — Derived from the Germanic elements kuoni "brave" and rad "counsel".
  • Ulrich — From the Germanic name Odalric meaning "prosperity and power", from the element odal "heritage" combined with ric "power".
  • Brandt — Derived from the element brand meaning "sword".

Frequented Places Bars and the occasional forest
First Love No one
First Kiss Random guy from his school days
First Time Random guy (or girl?) from his school days
Any illnesses? None
Page Created 22:32, February 17, 2017 (UTC)
Page Updated 22:32, February 17, 2017 (UTC)
Miscellaneous Trivia


Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.