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Tokyo


Tokyo, officially the Tokyo Metropolis, is the capital and most populous prefecture of Japan. Located at the head of Tokyo Bay, the prefecture forms part of the Kantō region on the central Pacific coast of Japan's main island of Honshu.

tokyo, japan
capital of japan

Roleplay[]

Juleks[]

Lovable Idiot • Amateur Chef • father of three
[ AGE ] 28.    [ SPECIES ] wizard.
[ CAREER ] housewife.    [ RELATIONSHIP ] dating.

This, admittedly, had been slightly rushed due to recent events. Julian had been planning this for a month or so now, but it was meant to be happening next week. However, he had a small suspicion (actually, it was quite large), that if he had stayed in England then Tessa might have whacked him so hard Tommy would have made a return and he was looking to avoid that. He was right on one thing, though, and that was that Ruslan was a quiet kid. He wasn't sure if either of their genes would have lead to a noisy child (Claire and Fabian got that from their mother's side, which isn't something Julian has ever vocally said) but it meant that travelling wasn't...much of an issue. He cried a little bit with the portkey. Actually, Julian was coming to the conclusion Ruslan might just be a normal child and whatever standard he had was set by the twins. They were in Tokyo that night. He...lost the booking in Japan. He wasn't sure how but he ended up choosing Tokyo for the surprise. Like he said, it was for the food and they were seated at one of the most lucrative restaurants the city had to offer. A semi-private location with a high chair for the baby. "You like the view, right?" He asked, really deflecting what he really wanted to talk about that he was picking out any conversation he could find.

Julian

A

aleksandra romanova

koldovstoretz alumna — owner of wanderlust
[ AGE ] 25 y/o.    [ SPECIES ] witch.
[ CAREER ] chef de cuisine.    [ RELATIONSHIP ] dating.

Aleks is frankly surprised Julian managed to pull the trip off, but he did. Even if the destination wound up completely different to what he had initially told her, he had still done well by his promise and gotten her out of the country. It certainly didn't hurt that he wasn't opposed to bringing Ruslan along. Otherwise, Aleks would be the first to acknowledge that she definitely would not have come. Months old or hours old, he's her child — her only child, her baby — and she'll be damned if she's tens of countries and several timezones away from him. It has certainly made the more enjoyable parts of this vacation a bit harder to work in, but they've managed quite alright so far, if she may say so herself. At the question, she lifts her head, looking away from the menu briefly to glance out the window beside which they were seated. Faint wisps of a smile curve her lips as she does so, but before long, she's looking back at him and that soft, thoughtful smile falters. "Of course I do," Aleks replies, brow furrowing. It's an expression of subtle curiosity. She doesn't realize he's procrastinating bringing up anything important, but the apparent insecurity certainly rings a few alarms in her head. Julian is always so confident, so self-assured, that the question really does have her metaphorically scratching her head. "I didn't think we'd be here tonight," she admits, "So even if it weren't such a lovely country — which it is — I would still love the view."

Florence Pugh YB

J

Lovable Idiot • Amateur Chef • father of three
[ AGE ] 28.    [ SPECIES ] wizard.
[ CAREER ] housewife.    [ RELATIONSHIP ] dating.

Julian's head turned back to beam at her. Did he think the view was him? Yes. In his defence – he thought the view (Aleks) was lovely as well. "When there's a will, there's a way," he said, the smile refusing to leave his face. It wasn't an unnatural smile, but it wasn't a natural one either. A nervous one, one that hid a heartbeat that was seemed to be running a marathon. He was glad he didn't sweat a whole lot or might he be in need of a shower before he even had the guts to properly open his mouth. "You deserve a weekend away with just us." Not like she had Polina around, but...by extension, she didn't have Vasya around either. "I was thinking this...this sort of weekend trip—I know we just started this one and I might be jumping the gun here—but this could be more of a...frequent sort of thing. Travelling, just a weekend, here and there. Ruslan is, of course, welcome to join us." Julian then turned to look at their child, reaching forward to allow his son to grip his finger. "I've never done much travelling, besides with Tommy but he doesn't count." He wasn't quite rambling to put it off but he wasn't exactly jumping into the bush either. "I don't know anything besides that. Where exactly..." he stopped and took a sip of red wine. He hated red wine. Which is why he ordered it, he won't be drinking a lot if he can barely stand the taste of it. Of course, he blamed Tessa for developing a tolerance to it. It ended up being the only thing in the fridge after he admitted it was his least favourite drink. He wasn't sure if they were connected, it was never confirmed, but he drank it without saying a word. "I'm not sure. But I've got a list of places we can go to tomorrow and if everything works out...well, maybe this can become a tradition. With us three." And any others who may join their small family.

Julian

A

aleksandra romanova

koldovstoretz alumna — owner of wanderlust
[ AGE ] 25 y/o.    [ SPECIES ] witch.
[ CAREER ] chef de cuisine.    [ RELATIONSHIP ] dating.

Well, Julian's attractive. He's conventionally pretty, charismatic, charming, has green eyes and cute dimples. For Merlin's sake, he's her son's father. But was he the view she was referring to? No, not at all. The city has an amazing view - possibly even better than Wanderlust, which she didn't even think was possible until now. When she glances back at him, though, a smile curving her red-painted lips as she intends to tease him about the blatant misinterpretation, she notices his smile. As such, her falters. It doesn't even have his cute dimples. It doesn't reach his eyes. Is she supposed to believe it's real? Natural? Well, spoiler alert: she won't. Her brow furrows as her smile completely fades. Although she looks very confused, she listens intently, waiting patiently for him to spit out whatever it is that's clearly got him so mentally worked up. "Ruslan isn't going to answer you if that's what you're expecting," she deadpans, not unkindly. She raises an eyebrow, wordlessly encouraging him to continue. When it seems he's done, she purses her lips, looking unsure about the offer he's extended. "As kind as that is... and as appealing as the idea is, Julian, I — I've got a restaurant to run. I have my family in Scotland, my nieces and nephews... I don't want Ruslan to grow up away from them, from what little remains accessible of his culture." Aleks pauses, hesitating to continue. She knows he deserves at the very least a full explanation for her reasoning, but those are her biggest concerns at this time regarding that specific idea. She shouldn't overwhelm him with anything else right now. "I've done it before, and I loved it, but... it just isn't logistically possible right now."

Florence Pugh YB

J

Lovable Idiot • Amateur Chef • father of three
[ AGE ] 28.    [ SPECIES ] wizard.
[ CAREER ] housewife.    [ RELATIONSHIP ] dating.

"I could be a legilimens, or I could speak baby, you never know," Julian said, biting his lip when the smile disappeared. Not what he wanted. "No, no, of course not, I'm not suggesting we become, you know, nomads who wander the earth," he said with a small laugh. He couldn't get away with that, even if it was what he wanted, not with Tessa and his two other kids. Although, considering what he had just done to Tessa–it might be on the table. "We'd still be living in England, doing our thing with everyone and everything, just...take a trip here and there altogether. With baby Ruslan, who is very much agreeing with me right now, aren't you?" He asked, looking at Ruslan before puffing his cheeks out in a humourous way, before looking back to Aleks. "Just...an escape. A family escape." Yes. The 'f' word. What a great start. This is going great. He leant forward. Serious-time. It was serious. This was serious. No jokes. Absolutely no joking. "I know we're kind of an unconventional pair, not really going by the rule books, and some people would say I'm rushing this but we have a child so I think...I think it's safe to say the status quo of time lines isn't really going to fit for us so I think we should just do what we want to do and not what other people expect of us." He was rambling. Who? Who had told him he was rushing? No one. But he was worried she was going to think he was rushing everything. Maybe he was? "I just...I don't think I've ever really felt the way I feel with you and it's not just, you know, attraction, which yes, is very much there, but it's more than that. I...I'm happy, really happy, with you. I feel safe, I feel comfortable, and I know this is very forward and yes, there are so many things to consider, such as work, but we can do it. I promise we can do it, even through sheer force of will. But I love you, like I have never loved anyone else–" romantically, obviously his children was not in this equation here "—and I don't want to build a life with anyone else or even risk losing you." He stopped there, letting it all sink in, before he realised something–he forgot the most vital part of this. He patted his jacket and pants because, in the moment, he forgot which pocket it was in. Inner pocket of his jacket. He pulled it out and placed it onto the table, fumbling to open it and show it to her. Inside was a silver ring with rather crude engravings. "I...I made it. It's not the best looking ring, I know, but I took a class and I didn't really use magic. I know I could have gotten the most glistening diamond in the world for you but I sort of figure you'd appreciate something more organic." Inside the ring, if she picked it up, the words 'always remembering you' were engraved. He leant back, watching her with wide eyes, knowing he could never go back now. This was it.

Julian

A

aleksandra romanova

koldovstoretz alumna — owner of wanderlust
[ AGE ] 25 y/o.    [ SPECIES ] witch.
[ CAREER ] chef de cuisine.    [ RELATIONSHIP ] dating.

"Speak baby?" Aleks echoes, brow furrowing. "Is that even possible? Like — is that a real language? Because I — I know it's made its way into popular movies and television series, but, you know, I didn't think it was possible, wizard or not. Even if the wizarding world is a box of surprises." Oh, she's rambling. She's rambling and Julian is off talking about this possible new life of theirs. A life where they're one big happy family, when Aleks is a walking, living curse — a nightmare, honestly, if what you're looking for is stability and a happy family you can live with in a Victorian-era house. Julian is here, calling them a family, and... Merlin, Aleks can't even look him in the eye while he's gracing her with this whole vision of the life they could have together further down the line. Or, well, not so further. It's now. Here. This is the moment that's supposed to define the rest of her life. Marriage, children, an entirely new family when the one she was born into is in shambles. It's broken beyond salvation because of her, because of her crappy father, because of this dumb, misogynistic institution that keeps taking and taking without giving. She betrayed her family, she abandoned them, and here she is, finding herself in a position to start a new one altogether. It's so fucking crazy and stupid. Why does she get a chance at a new life, at a new family, when she isn't even capable of patching up the one she already had? Why does she get a do-over? Why her? What did she do that makes her so worthy of having a kid like Ruslan, a boyfriend like Julian — Merlin, a sister like Vasya? She doesn't deserve any of it, and it'd be wrong for her to pretend like she has the right to take Julian up on this far-fetched dream when she knows she wouldn't be at peace with that decision or herself. She needs to make amends, fix herself... be a better person than she is now. Julian deserves that much. "Julian, I —" Her expression is soft, but wary. Guarded. There's a lot on her mind, and there's a lot of uncertainty that she isn't in a place to express to him right now. This isn't the time, the place, and she isn't in the right mindset. "It's a, It's —" Aleks sighs. Sure, the ring has its imperfections, but to Aleks? It's the prettiest piece of jewelry she could ever own. Not just materialistically speaking, but symbolically, it carries so much weight and love that it could make her cry. She doesn't deserve it. This. Any of it. Tokyo, Seoul, the Maldives — Julian deserves better. She deserves worse. Merlin, Ruslan, too — he deserves the world, the stars, the moon, the fucking universe, and it's so much more than Aleks could give him right now. "It's the prettiest ring I've ever seen, but I — I can't. I mean... my family is... a mess right now, Julian. I abandoned them. I turned my back on them. God, I let my sister get stabbed in the foot, Julian, I'm — I'm a mess. I'm a curse and a jinx all rolled into one, and I'm sorry. I can't do that to you. Not right now. Yes, I want it all. Merlin, I do, but I can't do that when my heart is committed to fixing the family that I broke. I can't do that when I'm still hung up on the fact that I've always panicked and abandoned the people I care about when I get too overwhelmed or... I don't know. I just — I need therapy. I need help. I'm not... good right now, and I — I know you mean well, and fucking hell, I don't want anything more than to give all of me to you, but I just — I can't. Not until I fix myself and the things I broke. It's... it's not a no, Julian, it's just a... not right now. You deserve better than someone who can't commit to this marriage completely. You deserve more than me."

Florence Pugh YB

J

Lovable Idiot • Amateur Chef • father of three
[ AGE ] 28.    [ SPECIES ] wizard.
[ CAREER ] housewife.    [ RELATIONSHIP ] dating.

Julian could see what the answer was going to be before she opened her mouth. It was the way she looked, the way she carried herself, that Julian realised that he probably wasn't going to be receiving the answer that he had hoped for. His hopeful, excited, expression died down to something that wasn't sadness, anger, or even hurt. It was the realisation that he had put too much pressure on them far too quickly. It was always a fault of his, wasn't it? He never really knew what it was like to pause and appreciate something in the moment. No, no, he did know what it was like, he knew it too well. Growing up, it's all he knew. Nothing really happened when his mother raised him (his father was all but an absentee father). He had an old tutor with a beard down to his stomach teach him whatever was appropriate and Julian spent his time sitting in silence, swinging his legs. It was a life of monotony and Julian spent the next twenty years doing everything he could to not live that life. So he rushed, and did everything he thought that was the opposite of monotony. Security. He fell into the wrong crowd, got arrested, joined the black parade. Even his children, as much as he and Tessa craved a normal life for them, weren't exactly predictable. They kept him on his toes. He'd been so terrified of falling into the same mindset that he had as a child, the dull and lifeless prison, that he'd forgotten it was okay to slow down. It also didn't help that he knew everything could change tomorrow. He could go missing again, he could get attacked, Aleks could get attacked, even Tessa could disappear again. Tomorrow's security had never really been a promised concept. He listened to what Aleks was saying, of course he did, and he slowly shut the lid of the box. She needs time. Julian could give her that, of course he could. He wasn't going to lie–he hated how Aleks thought of herself. Perhaps it was because he thought the world of her, could see how good of a mother she already is, and that she will be even better as Ruslan grows, that it saddened him to know Aleks didn't feel the same way.

"I don't agree, on the last bit," Julian said after a moment, "I don't deserve you. Say what you want, I still think I'm the luckiest man alive to be able to be sitting here with you." That was truthful. He knew he'd inadvertently put Aleks through hell–something he never would do intentionally–and he was still amazed that she'd even given him another chance. "But no, no, I understand. You know I just want the best for you. I can...I can toss it over the balcony if it makes it any better." Julian couldn't comment on the family. Part of Julian thought the family did deserve Aleks deserting them. The other part of Julian thought that Aleks had every right to make a life for herself. However, it always seemed to boil down to the monarchy. Then again, he'd only met two of Aleks's family-Vasya and Tomya. What he had seen, from the moments he'd spent with them, both of them loved Aleks in their own way. Vasya, especially. He still remembers spending twenty minutes once in St. Mungo's as Aleks was in an appointment, Vasya was booked in after. She'd spent the entire time chattering away about Aleks's and how proud she was of her achievements, in both her personal life and career life. Then she spent the next ten minutes talking about Tomya, Nat and Liza in Hogwarts. He didn't have the heart to tell her that Tomya's 'A' in transfiguration wasn't the type of mark that she thought it was. He was pretty sure Vasya had mixed it up with 'EE' or they'd told her the wrong information. "I think everyone is deserving of a family, even if it's not the one they're born into." He said this carefully, not sure if he was being a dick when he said that, or if Aleks would even appreciate it. "I didn't mean to overwhelm you. I know it's a lot and I probably didn't think it through as much as I did. I don't....I don't think you're a mess. But even if you are, you're a very cute mess! Ruslan thinks so too, he just agreed with me. I know this because I totally speak the same language." He was, of course, trying to somewhat lighten the mood. Maybe bring her to laugh. He didn't want her to feel terrible about it–she had every right to say no. Julian wasn't going to make her feel bad for saying no, of course not.

Julian

A



Tessa and Julian[]

Lovable Idiot • Amateur Chef • father of three
[ AGE ] 28.    [ SPECIES ] wizard.
[ CAREER ] housewife.    [ RELATIONSHIP ] her bitch.

Julian didn't know what to expect-nothing good. That's for sure. This was a somewhat alcohol-driven idea (Julian always got drunk off red wine the quickest) but he had mostly sobered up by this point. He also wasn't sure if Tessa would just throw it at him then leave on her heel without even so much as a glance or the opposite. What was the opposite? Support him in bringing back the person who had inadvertently taken everything from him. Every time he passed a mirror, he always paused to look. Was that really him? Or was it a stranger? Sometimes, it felt it was the latter. He knew he wasn't the same as he use to be. Even Eden saw it; the first time she saw him again. She took one look and Julian could see it there, that flash of confusion, an acknowledgement that something has changed. Julian wasn't quite sure if this was for the better or for the worse yet. Fabian told him it was for the better, just because he wasn't in his bed all the time like his mum had been after she'd gone on a holiday. Julian decided to discount his son's opinion. Part of him felt it was for the former, the other the latter. Perhaps a part of him resented Tommy, sweet and innocent Tommy who could make everyone like him. Tommy saw the stars when he looked up at the sky and be filled with wonder. Tommy who had taken him away from his family and all that he'd ever known. Tommy, the copy. Tommy, the original.

Yet when he woke up, that first time, he felt lighter. Lighter than he had in years. Even despite the last memory he truly had, one that didn't seem to slip through his fingers every time he tried to grab for one, was his father's murder.

He hadn't told anyone this, not even Tessa, but it wasn't them who'd abducted Julian at the school ground. He wasn't even abducted then. A car had stopped, rolled down a window, and there was his dad. Same face, more lines but the same man nonetheless, and he asked Julian to get in. That it was urgent. That he, Julian, was in danger. Two hours later, his dad was dead and someone was knocking Julian out before he could even react. Then he woke up at home with Tessa staring down at him with a scowl tainted with worry. He wasn't sure if keeping that to himself was right or wrong, or neither. Did it change anything? Maybe not. Nikita. That was the person he was told did it. That he'd been hunted down by Tessa. It was over. But it never settled right with Julian–what did this guy have against Julian? Enough to hunt his dad? Enough to wipe his memory? Probably would have been better just to have killed him. If Julian voiced his fears that maybe it was someone else–what would happen? Do they try and track the person down? Get revenge for his father? Julian hadn't seen the man since he was twelve. He had no true personal attachment to him anymore but even then–it was strange. Unsettling. In the end, he decided it wasn't worth anything. Better to rebuild his life, worry about it if anyone new started knocking on their door threatening murder. If they were truly interested in hurting Julian–surely they would have done something by now?

Still, despite his father's blood on his own hands being the last thing he remembered, he'd felt lighter. There was one constant message running through his head. One single thought. You are worthy of their love. He hadn't believed it before but now he did. It felt right, thinking that, like every nerve in his body was nodding along to it. Their. Tessa, Fabian, Claire, Eden, Vince. But he was missing something, someone, and that it was incomplete. He was yearning for someone, he just didn't know who. The name was on the tip of his tongue, when he dreamed, he dreamed of her but every time she'd turn so he could see her face, he'd wake. He'd almost prefer to start having nightmares instead. Then he found her. Aleks. He'd clung to the belief that he was Tommy, that Tommy was him. But now, standing alone on the Japanese street, lit only by the streetlights, he wondered: was it even his love? Or was it Tommy's that had overflown where not even the return of Julian could drain that cup? Was he even right to have asked Aleks to have taken that leap with him? Of course, Ruslan had changed things. Julian would have still been around regardless. Or maybe he wouldn't have? Maybe Aleks would have insisted Julian gone. Said that he wasn't the father, Tommy was. If Julian was not entitled to Tommy's love, then it could be argued that he wasn't entitled to Ruslan either. Maybe he wasn't–Ruslan's father, that is. Tommy made his own decisions and his relationship with Aleks is what conceived Ruslan. Not Julian. Perhaps calling himself Ruslan's father makes him nothing more than a fraud. I feel safe with you, I feel happy when I am around you. Nothing he said was a lie. He stood by what he said. Aleks was it for him. He'd known this the moment he saw her over Timofei's head. The moment they'd spent their proper day with each other and it was mostly Julian cooking as Aleks ate from the pan the second he slid something off the bench.

He could lose one family if he did this. He could lose another family if he didn't do this. But he couldn't live like this, he couldn't live with a ghost. Tommy chose to return as you. But Julian never asked to become Tommy. He never asked Tommy to let him come back. Deep down, he knew Tommy could have performed wonders if they'd never figured out how to get rid of him. Won over Tessa and the twins, stayed with Aleks and Ruslan and made a new life for himself. Maybe it wouldn't have been the same for the former three, but the twins would grow up forgetting about Julian-only knowing Tommy. Uncle Tommy, even. It would have been just Tessa. He was asking a lot from her, he knew that. Merlin, he knew that. To even bring the thing to him, let alone stay around. If this didn't work out, if Aleks and Tommy decide to try and hitch, he knew Tessa would bring him back. Or maybe she wouldn't? Maybe she'd decide that if Julian was willing to risk it, he could deal with the consequences himself. But, assuming that she would, or Julian returns in some other way, at least Julian will know then. Know whether it's worth fighting for Aleks, selfishly, or if it's better to step back knowing his presence is only causing her grief.

JRwb10

T

Slytherin Alumna Lincliff Business Tycoon
[ AGE ] 27 y/o.    [ SPECIES ] Witch.
[ CAREER ] Businesswoman.    [ RELATIONSHIP ] Single.

Let the record show that Tessa is absolutely opposed to this idea. Not only does it drudge up the horrid sense of abandonment and loss that defined her formative childhood years as well as her pivotal Hogwarts years, but it serves as an echo of her place in Julian's life. It's not even her life, actually, that concerns her; it's her children's. Claire and Fabian. So young, so innocent, oblivious to the extent their father is willing to go to... do what, exactly? Secure the love of a woman that isn't able to love him back? Start a new family while turning his back on the one he already has? It's what he's doing, really; mooching off of her under the pretense of being there for their children, when he's up a mentally ill Russian Grand Duchess' butt. It's pathetic, infuriating, demoralizing, and insulting. Frankly, Tessa is completely prepared to drop off the leech — something she's going out of her way to do, which further cements how disappointed she is in Julian's lack of commitment to the twins — and simply disappear. Take the twins and leave for... Germany, maybe? The United States? To even entertain the idea of taking the twins to Russia when said country is her biggest source of problems right now is laughable, so that's out of the question.

Truth be told, she isn't sure if she can do that to Julian. However she may feel at present, no matter how betrayed or wounded, she understands that kidnapping her children and stealing them from their father would just do more damage long-term to both her relationship with them and their relationship with him. It'd make her no better than Adele and Sabrina, who she always swore she would go out of her way to mimic or model as a mother. Does she feel like she has no other choices? Frankly, she's kind of getting to that point. As small of an act as this is, and as innocently as Julian is trying to poise the situation to her, Tessa was the one to deal with the fallout of his kidnapping and the parasite itself. She had to scour the Earth for an expert that could help her out, because Aleks was — as she is now — utterly useless in defending Julian. As far as she's concerned, he's being selfish and greedy and stubborn, and he's not acknowledging the reality that he's fallen for a woman who doesn't have the heart to love him back. In Tessa's eyes, this is Julian choosing her — them — over Claire and Fabian. Like she's mentioned before, she doesn't care about herself, but to prioritize another woman by risking your entire identity rather than letting her get therapy and focusing on your children?

Tessa could never do that. She doesn't understand or sympathize with the predicament he's in, that much is true. How do you just... risk everything for someone else? That is what he's doing. Worst comes to happen, Tessa isn't helping him out. This is a mess of his own doing, and she's tired of having to clean up other people's messes. He's choosing to disregard the risks associated with this parasitic relationship, and it's completely out of her hands. It's what he gets for being stubborn, she'd reason. Why concern myself over someone who doesn't consider my children enough of a reason to stay and find another option? In any case, there's really no point in dwelling on the situation any more. She's here now, staring at him blankly as she sets the glass on the table. She turns on her heel wordlessly, ready to leave the same way she came. Maybe she'd take a detour. There's some people she has to meet with this year from Tokyo, and, well, she may as well get it out of the way now.

Tessa's wb

D

Lovable Idiot • Amateur Chef • father of three
[ AGE ] 28.    [ SPECIES ] wizard.
[ CAREER ] housewife.    [ RELATIONSHIP ] her bitch.

Maybe it was the image of Tessa walking away from him that made him pause. That made his rushing thoughts come together and reality hit him like a truck. He stood there watching her back, not even looking at the thing, and his eyebrows pulled together and a cold panic settled over him. People talk a lot of sh-t until they have to see it through. "Tessa," he said, pleading underwriting her name, and he jerked forward to make his way towards her. "Tessa, don't go," he said softly as he followed her, "please, don't go. I need you." And that was it, wasn't it? Aleks wasn't able to offer him everything he wanted but could he even offer the same to her? Look her in the eye and say he's all hers when he still calls himself Tessa's? Maybe he was a leech...maybe he fucked it all up trying to make Aleks happy...but at least he could say he tried his best to make the best out of a situation. "I know I'm asking a lot of you. I...just don't go." he outstretched his hand to gently hold her by the bicep. He knew, if it was anyone else, that they'd get their hands cut off. He wasn't even sure he would be saved this time. But he was willing to risk it. What if she killed him? He's already asking her to help him in something that could conceivably be argued as assisted s-no, no, it wasn't. Julian fumbled then. Not sure what to follow up from that thought. The thought striking him hard enough that he visibly flinched. He dropped his hand. "I can't lose you. Not again." The realisation was like someone had taken the glasses off him. He sagged and ran a hand through his hair, grabbing a fistful and tugging on it, harshly as if he was trying to rip it from his scalp. "I love her, Tessa, god, I love her. And she doesn't love me back." He was pretty sure by the time he opened his eyes, Tessa would be gone. He knew she would have little time listening to his love declarations, especially to someone who doesn't really love him. But when did love ever run on logic? When did it depend on whether or not you were loved back? "I thought...I thought maybe if I brought him back, just for a moment, then...it'd do something. Give her a chance to say goodbye. Or at least...give me an answer. I don't know." What was he even saying? He looked at Tessa again. What does it matter? If he had Tessa, the twins, then what does it matter? "I thought she was the one." He almost looked like he was going to cry. But then he looked at Tessa again and part of him suspected that maybe he'd already lost Tessa. He turned his head away, staring at the ground before he closed his eyes. Who was he willing to lose? Aleks or Tessa? And that was it. That was what it would always boil down into. It'd never have been the former. Push comes to shove, it was Tessa. "There's another way," he whispered. "I...I'm not sure if it'd work. But it could. I can't make her happy and I can't leave you. I can't leave the twins." That was said with conviction. It was the truth. He turned his head to stare in the direction Aleks was sleeping and then he got on his knees in front of Tessa. "I know I look pathetic, embarrassing right now," he said, grabbing Tessa's shirt, "but I need you. I need you to do something for me and then I'm yours. You can throw me into an ocean if you want, yell at me, I don't care. I'll go home and this will be over. It will all be over and you won't have to hear about her anymore." He took a deep breath. "Dark magic. If we...separate Tommy from me. Put him in another body. Then I can walk away. Tommy will no longer have a hold on me. This'll be over." This was a lie, and he was sure Tessa would know it's a lie. But that lie wasn't really meant for Tessa to believe. That was something for Aleks to believe. If this was to work. He was looking up at her, with a face that wasn't unlike Fabian's whenever he tried to win someone over. Fabian had always taken after his father.

JRwb10

T

Slytherin Alumna Lincliff Business Tycoon
[ AGE ] 27 y/o.    [ SPECIES ] Witch.
[ CAREER ] Businesswoman.    [ RELATIONSHIP ] Single.

Well, there's one thing Julian got right: people talk shit until they have to see it through. Tessa expected Julian to beg for her to stop, to reconsider, to stay, but she certainly didn't expect herself to hang back and actually give him more time of her day when he's so boldly affirmed where his priorities lie. Or maybe she should have? At this point, Tessa wishes she could say with certainty she knows what she's doing and understands how she feels, but every day, something happens — or in this case someone, she'd amend — that challenges this presumed truth. Ten years ago, she wouldn't have even let the bug live. She'd have killed the bug, come down to Tokyo and killed Julian in cold blood. Some would say it's a testament of her growth, but... not really. That same seventeen year old girl is still inside of her somewhere, challenging everything she thought she knew about what it meant to be a family. From being willing to kill and die for each other to believing you should want to live for your family — it's been quite a road to get to this point. And now, that seventeen year old kid is reminding her that maybe she was closer to the truth than she is now. That maybe she has the right answer to that ill-fated question. When he grabs her bicep, Tessa stops. It takes her a moment to turn around to face him. She sucks in a breath, trying to steel herself and shake off some of the fury that coils inside her stomach. Finally, she she turns on her heel. Where warmth and fondness was once bright, cold emptiness remains. She's looking at him... but it's not really her that's looking at him. It's her insecurities and the traumas of her past; the ones she feels like she's reliving yet again, because of someone who can't seem to let go. "See, you say you need me, but you don't. You're showing me you don't. Or in any case, you're showing me you don't care enough about the fact that you need me. You're risking it all, Julian, and I swear — cross me as many fucking times as you want, I don't care. But Claire and Fabian — your children, your goddamn blood — deserve better than a father that's willing to risk losing who he is because he can't accept that if his girlfriend ever loved him, she'd get therapy and fix her fucking daddy issues so she can love him for him instead of this fake alter-ego you developed my chance. It's spineless and pathetic, and I genuinely thought you were twice the man you're proving to be." Is it harsh? She'll be the first to accept that it is, but no, she doesn't regret it. She doubts she ever will. As far as she's concerned, Julian needs to get an earful about the mistakes he's making. "You say you can't lose me," she continues, quieter, softer, unlike the sharp, hostile tone she undertook moments before. "But we're past that point, Julian." There's a moment of silence as she watches him unravel before her. She doesn't say anything — she barely even breathes, actually — but when he grabs a fistful of her shirt, she instinctively reaches for his wrists, pinching the skin she finds and twisting it to get him to let her go. "Don't," she hisses, "You don't get to do that. You don't get to act all sad and mopey when you made this fucking mess. You could have let her grieve Tommy. You could have let her get help. Fight for herself. Give her distance. You decided to make this mess because you couldn't wait." The reality of what he's asking of her settles, and just like that — the coil she'd been trying too hard to undo, to let go of, snaps. Tessa steps back immediately, frowning, searching his eyes for any hint that he's pulling her leg. When she finds none, she licks her bottom lip, shaking her head. If her eyes look a little shinier than usual — well, that's probably just the lighting, right? "No, no... no. Soul magic... dark magic... That's not who we are anymore. It's not who I am anymore. Merlin, do you even hear yourself, Julian?"

Tessa's wb

D

Lovable Idiot • Amateur Chef • father of three
[ AGE ] 28.    [ SPECIES ] wizard.
[ CAREER ] housewife.    [ RELATIONSHIP ] her bitch.

"I know, I know, I know I fucked it all up, I'm not asking you to forgive me, I..." he trailed off, "I was lost in the moment and I got caught up without thinking it through. I was, am, is..." he trailed off as his brows pulled together "...have been drinking and I was alone, and I got caught up in thoughts. I know I'm just making excuses but what I'm saying is. What I'm saying is..." he trailed off because he had lost his train of thought. "I know I'm being spineless, I know what I said, what I did, was selfish and reckless and I'm a coward because I can't see it through. I can't give her everything, but I can't leave her alone, and I'm stuck in this middle and it's fucking everything up. I know. I don't expect you to forgive me. I know I shouldn't need you to drag me out of every mess I make but I can't do it by myself." When Tessa began to pinch his skin, he let go of her shirt but only to twist his hands so he was holding her wrists. "Say what you want, I won't cross you. I won't cross you or our children. I won't leave you three. I can't leave you," he whispered, looking up at her through the strands of his curls, his green eyes dark and shadowy. As light as Tommy had made Julian feel. It wasn't his lightness. It was Tommy's. Not his. Nothing of this was his. He'd lost control, over his own personality, his identity, and now his life. "I know she doesn't love me," he whispered, "I know I was in denial for so long, about her, why...I...I don't know, Tess, I don't know. I can feel him. I can feel him still there." He let go of her hands and clawed at his shirt, right above his heart. "Inside of me. I tried making the best out of it but I fucked it all up. And I don't know if what I feel is my own emotions or if it's his emotions, his wants, my wants...I don't know who I am anymore. I don't know who I am. And I want out, I can't live with a ghost. We can say that he wasn't real, that he was just some alter-ego, but it doesn't feel that way. I don't know who I am and I don't know if this is a war I can win. I can't leave you, or them. I don't want to. I don't. I can't. But there's something about her that keeps drawing me back and I don't care if I'm pathetic. If I'm weak. If I'm a coward. I'd rather be all that than lose my family." Even with Tessa stepping away, he didn't get up, he didn't get up from his knees. Instead, he sat back onto his heels, his hands on his thighs. "I know," he whispered, "I know I'm asking a lot from you. I know I'll never be able to repay you. I've never been able to repay you." Even taking care of Tessa after she came back from Nikita never scratched the surface for what Tessa has done for him. "But I need out, Tessa, I need out and I can't do it by myself. I can't do it without you."

JRwb10

T

Slytherin Alumna Lincliff Business Tycoon
[ AGE ] 27 y/o.    [ SPECIES ] Witch.
[ CAREER ] Businesswoman.    [ RELATIONSHIP ] Single.

Again with the unnecessary grabbing? Tessa's face pinches into a scowl and she yanks her wrists out of his grip. It's not cute, sweet, admirable, or adorable. It's annoying and grating, and all it does is discourage Tessa from even entertaining the idea of helping him out of this mess he - as he so nicely put it - made all on his own. "I'm not helping you out with anything until you talk to her, because for Christ's sake, Julian — this all could've been avoided if you stopped trying to be the hero nobody needs." At her wits' end, Tessa just sighs and shakes her head, visibly deflating. "I can't help you until you start helping yourself, Julian. I'm not a therapist. I'm not a miracle worker, either."

Tessa's wb

D

Lovable Idiot • Amateur Chef • father of three
[ AGE ] 28.    [ SPECIES ] wizard.
[ CAREER ] housewife.    [ RELATIONSHIP ] her bitch.

He was planning to talk to her but he knew that the moment he opened the window for Tommy to come back, in any shape and form, she'd most likely jump on it. Again-he was flying off the seat of his pants here and due to his previous plan, which was now scrapped, Tessa was the first person he ended up talking to. "I know you're not my therapist, I know you can't fix me, I don't...I don't want you to fix me but I can't do this on my own. I'm asking you to help me because you're the one of, if not the, best witch walking this planet and you're the only person whose hands I'd trust with my life," he said. Besides himself, obviously. But he trusted Tessa to not only be able to pull it off but make sure he was safe too. That he'd see it through. Anyone else? He'd have been far more cautious towards. He wouldn't have broached this with Aleks, or even Eden. Maybe that's why he turned to Tessa first before even glancing at Aleks's door. "Of course I'm going to talk to Aleks, but she'll want Tommy. She won't say no to this." Julian didn't say it, he didn't want to say it, but he could almost see Aleks throwing the bug at him without even a second thought. Then again, considering Tessa was a legilimens, perhaps he didn't need to. "Please. If she says no then this can go to nothing and we can work from there but if she says yes. I...at least then it'll be confirmed to me where I stand." And then he could rebuild. Move on, even. But he wasn't very good at ghosting people, from walking away, so it'd result in some co-parenting situation. Then again-Aleks might not even want that.

JRwb10

T

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